I was in the shower this morning (as I often do), thinking about Byzantine propaganda (which I don't do that often, at least, not in the shower), when I was reminded of a question Mike asked me in our Byzantine History class a few years ago. I had brushed the question aside back then, simply because I was busy focusing on so much else, but it slammed me full-force while my hair was soaking in shampoo.

"Considering the manner in which Justinian II entered Constantinople, was there ever any sign that he adopted Davidic imagery?" Well, it was something like that, only worded better.

St. Theophanes the Confessor, in his chronicle, has this to say about Justinian's return from exile in 706 AD:

In the same year Justinian reached the imperial city with Tervel and his Bulgars. His camp extended from the Charisian gate to Blakhernai. For three days his troops talked with the men in the city, but were reviled by them, as the would not accept any agreement.

But Justinian and a few comrades got into the city without battle through a pipe, which threw Constantinople into confusion. After taking the town, for ashort time he quartered himself in the palace of Blakhernai.(Annus Mundi 6197, p.71 in the Turtledove translation of the chronicle)

This should ring bells of familiarity for some people, especially if you know the Old Testament in any detail:

The king and his men marched to Jerusalem to attack the Jebusites, who lived there. The Jebusites said to David, "You will not get in here; even the blind and the lame can ward you off." They thought, "David cannot get in here." Nevertheless, David captured the fortress of Zion, the City of David. On that day, David said, "Anyone who conquers the Jebusites will have to use the water shaft to reach those 'lame and blind' who are David's enemies." That is why they say, "The 'blind and lame' will not enter the palace." (2 Samuel 6-8).

So, like David, we have a ruler who sees himself as the divinely ordained ruler of his people, anointed by God, who also, ironically like David, was in exile for a while. It does seem really odd that there is no evidence via any of the written sources we have remaining, on coins, or in sources from neighboring states (Armenia, the Caliphate, or even from Italy), that Justinian, after this victory, adopted some sort of Davidic imagery surrounding his person. If there was one group of people more obsessed with the bible than modern-day protestants, it was the Byzantines during this period in their history.

This leaves only one question: Why the heck did Justinian not take advantage of a patently perfect opportunity to create/use biblical, old-testament propaganda in the service of the state? We do see this sort of thing in earlier rulers. There is, of course, the classic example of Justinian I comparing himself to Solomon upon the completion of Hagia Sophia, but there is also a lesser-known comparison of Heraklios with one of the Judges (can't remember which one, though, off the top of my head.) The contemporaries of Leo III and Constantine V compared them to Melchizedek. Therefore, the imagery exists in this period.

We are left, then, with some potential conclusions that need to be further examined:

1) Perhaps Justinian II DIDN'T return to his city from exile via a water pipe (which was, probably, the ruined aqueduct of Valens, for those keeping keeping track at home). He got into the city some other way--even openly through the Golden Gate. The story of Justinian sneaking through the waterpipe was a literary invention by Theophanes, or his earlier sources.

2) The stories, and comparisons WERE made...but in people's own heads. Byzantium, was, after all, a very literate culture when it came to the Bible. You made the connection yourself, and there was no need to reinforce it.

3) The sources have been lost. Which is also quite possible.

And now, off to work.

I sometimes wonder why the journey motif is so popular in fiction. And it's a popular thing to write songs about, too, come to think of it.

I suppose it is a way to escape from ourselves, into another world. At least, that's why I enjoy it. I've had an urge this last week to re-read the LOTR cycle, but there's so much else I want to read first, that I'd hate to re-read it again so soon. Although I could just pop open one of the two copies of the Silmarillion that I have, and get my Tolkien fix that way, ne?....(yay for 25 cent copies at yard sales? Like hell am I going to pass that up. The other copy I have is a second/third edition hardcover. Which will look nice on a hypothetical future bookshelf.)

Even so, watching the film version of Fellowship of the Ring reminds me just how Christian this cycle really is. Not overtly, and utterly so, like Narnia...but a subtle Christianity that isn't overt and scary towards those who have never been aware of the Mysteries. A whisper in a hallway, instead of screaming... or perhaps like a night light covered in stained glass in a dark room. There's something reassuring about Tolkien's writing that seems to be largely absent in C.S. Lewis' Narnia. Sure, it shows up in some of the books, especially in The Magician's Nephew, but in Prince Caspian and The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, it's almost absent.

Strangely, this same aspect is quite apparent in some of C.S. Lewis' other fictional writings, especially parts of Perelandra, which is another book I feel like re-reading a lot lately, but have been putting it off for the same exact reasons.

Fall is entering it's final stages, and most of the winter birds have arrived here. The stiff, cold wind coupled with fleets of white and gray clouds coming from the north, interspersed with flocks of Western Bluebirds and the last leaves torn from the trees, remind me that Advent is coming near. Winter is beginning to creep upon the land, and hold it tightly in its grasp. I can easily understand why in so many pre-industrial cultures winter was seen as a great enemy, and why it was feared that spring would never return. It is now less than a month until the celebration of the birth of the Incarnate Lord and savior in my world; shorter still until the celebration of the renewal of the temple for my Jewish friends. And it is already Eid, as well; one winter holiday down, I suppose, for my Muslim friends.

The hardest thing about the advent fast is not having any ice cream. ARGH.

Life right now is dull, almost obscenely so. But I suppose better to be in a space where nothing happens, than in a space where EVERYTHING happens...and soon enough, this slow patch will be gone, especially come the court date on December 23. Lord knows what will happen then. I expect a suspended license, but then that will make it nigh impossible to go to work, and since I'm pretty much supporting my parents right now (ugh), it'll mean we'll all be kicked out on the street. Probably. Though I wouldn't have that long to live on the street, I imagine, until I started going to school again.

There is, I have noticed, little justice in the world in which we live. It is up to ourselves to obtain the justice which we seek. I suspect it is never delivered into our hands, save for after our deaths. I am not sure I could wait that long, if the darker times returned once more.

I had a very strange dream this morning where I ended up marrying Taylor Swift. She came into Montezuma Castle, lamenting that she had no guide to take her to the Grand Canyon. Mike (my co-worker) said that if she could stand nerds, that I probably could do it. I replied that I could, yes, but Jon wouldn't like it. Mike retorted, "Aren't you leaving in a few months anyway? So what if they fire you. You can just leave early. Wish I had someplace to go." So anyway, I first led her on a tour of the castle, somehow even managing to go inside of it, and on my way out, Anne said that she "seemed like a nice girl, and you should marry her."

Since it was a Sunday, after the castle we went to do amtgard, where she beat the crap out of me with a polearm, and everyone was laughing at me. She laughed too, and said she ought to write a song about this sort of thing, as it was highly entertaining. Then we were at the grand canyon, and I waxed quazi-poetically about standing on the bones of an ancient sea...which somehow made her fall in love with me or something? The dream jumped ahead a season, and we were riding in the back of a pickup truck, and it was spring on the Mogellon Rim, and we were riding in it with a bunch of kids coming from a birthday party, and I was explaining the trees and the flowers (especially the Locust flowers, they were rather pretty) and the birds, and whatnot, and Taylor Swift was singing to them. Somehow we were going to ride all the way to Boston like this, and we did, hiding under raincoats as a storm rode in. After that, somehow it jumped forward again, and we were getting married, and she was getting Chrismated Orthodox, at Holy Cross in Flagstaff. My ex fiancee tried to rush in and break it up, but she did it late, having been distracted by a rock-paper-scissors fight with Joel, who was one of the guards at the door. It was all so very ODD.

Although... challenging someone to a rock-paper-scissors fight to prevent them from crashing a party DOES sound like something Joel would do.

But then, dreams are like that, I suppose.

I did almost absolutely NOTHING today. It felt nice. Going to finish my current Pratchett book tonight, poke at my phone again to see if it works, and then maybe go to sleep again. Or maybe watch some Doctor Who...or just pick up another book and continue reading. I am contemplating visiting Palatki tomorrow, just for something to do and to get out of the house for a bit, since there's no way I can make it to flagstaff tomorrow.

I watched the first half of the extended version of The Fellowship of the Ring tonight with the Nazgals (Sue and Kelly, namely). It was far better, and more enjoyable, than the theatrical version. Not saying, of course, that it was as good as the books, but enjoyable in a completely different manner, which was nice.

I still kind of wish I had an Arwen/Theodora/Éowyn to be with, but someday it'll probably happen. Nobody here that really even comes CLOSE.

But for now, I will sleep; on the morrow, I will catch up with movies.

Well, as it turns out, unless I manage to get a recommendation from Metropolitan Gerasimos before the week is out, I probably won't get to Holy Cross in January. Rather irksome, but they only have three open rooms on campus, and I can't afford to live off campus right off the bat. I have practically no time left for the recommendation...nor the funds to rush off to San Fransisco and meet with him. And nobody to crash with, either, which would mean a hotel, which is something I couldn't afford either. It looks like the earliest he'll be in Arizona will be in March.

This means I'll have another 6 months or so in Arizona, probably. Which isn't ENTIRELY a bad thing. It means I have more time to work with when it comes to continuing the Arthurian Campaign when I get the car back. It does mean more time with the friends I have here, newly made and newly re-acquainted. I'd also like to get a last shot of seeing Elegant Trogons before I go. But we will see. The downside (one of many) is that I'll probably need to get a second job, if not a better-paying full-time one. As fun as working at Montezuma Castle is, it's impossible to save up anything when your parents use your entire savings to buy groceries...and can't pay you back. I know it's the right thing to do, but that doesn't mean I *LIKE* it.

The time I spent at St. Anthony's was totally necessary, and I feel much better than before. I really needed the spiritual reboot, and seeing the Kursk Icon of the Theotokos was totally awesome--an unexpected bonus, even if it did require a bit of schedule juggling (in retrospect, I should have just crashed another night instead of going back up with Alex and then coming back down...I probably would have gotten some sleep, though I ended up just fine.) Here's some photos of my time there, under the cut:

( Photos from the Monastery-rather photo intensive, btw )

I just discovered a mod for Mount and Blade that makes it set in Medieval Europe...

...and it has the Byzantines.

Oh hell, as if I needed more to distract me. :-)


Legit post with real info and stories coming up soon. Maybe even...tonight?

(insert gripes about finances here that you've all seen before)

About three months ago, I found in my inbox a photo of our church from 1943(ish), which had been discovered by Fr. Nicholas. I took a comparison shot from what I THINK was the same point in the church last Friday, after the liturgy for St. John Chrysostom.

Circa 1943:


and now, 2009:


Such differences! I think it says a lot about the differences between Protestant Christianity and Orthodox Christianity. Tell me, what do you see? What do these photos tell you? What do they make you think about?

So: I called the Flagstaff Justice Court today about the citation I got Saturday night. For not showing current proof of insurance. Because I couldn't find the current one. Because my parents stuck it in a part of the car where this stuff doesn't normally go. Which means it was there THE WHOLE DAMN TIME. I give them my complaint number, and after a moment, they're "Huh?" Turns out they didn't have it yet. And so when I told them my court date was, essentially, tomorrow, they were all "But...that's....what? Makes NO SENSE."

So: they don't have it yet. I asked them what this means, they said that since the date is so soon and they still won't have it by the date, that the judge will either send me a summons or dismiss it entirely. Hoping for the latter, because I really don't want to deal with these folks any more than I have to...but it does continue to show just how screwed up the system is up there at the Flagstaff court system place thingy. *headdesk*

I DID get to nerd out about the Byzantine Empire today, at work; I had told this one cute girl that I was going to study Byzantine History and Orthodox Theology to become a priest (mostly to scare her off, and it worked*), when this couple were all "!BYZANTIUM!" As it turns out, they were learning about it as part of homeschooling their kids, and had a bunch of questions about it, and I was happy to answer them, as well as suggest to them a bunch of books on the topic. This kind of irked Richard a bit, because this was RIGHT at closing time. Whoopsies.

(*I've kind of adopted a policy of up-front mentioning my desires towards any woman who seems to find me remotely attractive, or that I find remotely attractive. If they run away, then I know that they're not worth my time, generally speaking. It's great at weeding out the crop, or as a device to let bycatch escape harmlessly, if we're going to go with the "fish in the sea" metaphor here)

A picture post will be coming before the week is out, I think. There is also a trip to the monastery on Thursday/Friday, and I am going to really try to carpool out there with somebody. I mean, it's not like they'd have to go out of my way to pick me up. Someone can drop me off at the starbucks in Camp Verde, after all, and I can REALLY use some one-on-one JesusTime, so to speak.

But, stolen from sarahs_history I present to you this meme. it made me feel happier, so maybe when you do it, it will too! Or something:

Comment here and I will tell you why I think you're awesome.

Even if we don't talk much, heck even if we have NEVER spoken, I want EVERYONE to participate. If you want to share the love and do the same at your journal, go ahead. You're under no obligation to carry it on if you comment here.

Dad now says he won't let me go to flagstaff on the weekends anymore. So: an announcement: the Arthurian D&D campaign is now canceled. I don't know when I'll see you guys anymore. If you cared, anyway.

If one more thing goes wrong, I WILL snap. I shit you not.

Where once was light
Now darkness falls
Where once was love
Love is no more
Don't say goodbye
Don't say I didn't try.


To the crows with this Popsicle stand called life. I am so tired of this blasted world and everything in it. Every time I get remotely happy, something happens and I am miserable again. Obviously that is my sole purpose in this world--and God--if there is one--means for me to be so. I was hoping that I was back to my normal cheerful self again...but apparently that is not to be.

I'm so tired. So very, very, weary and tired. Ten steps forward, ten steps back. I might as well stay where I am, since that is where I am destined to be. And this time, it's not even my fault.

But I'll still get the blame.

So, why even bother? Mostly because I don't know what else to do.

I first recommend reading seraphimsigrist's post on the Synaxis of the Archangels which was just yesterday, at this link: http://seraphimsigrist.livejournal.com/859276.html#cutid1 . It is a really excellent examination of one of my favorite feasts of the Liturgical year. Because really, Archangels are awesome...beyond words, and are among my favorite saints. Plus, he has a lot of the same thoughts I do, but he can word them a LOT better than I can. :-)

Things have been...interesting this last week. And really confusing. Though one thing is definitely certain, now. I know now where my boundaries are--and where they will remain. Strange events have made certain of that. But enough of this, for I do not wish to dwell here. Other things occupy the limited space in my brain as well, after all.

Like this random poem, for instance:
( Quest )

It has been 20 years since the Berlin Wall fell. In fact, one of my earliest memories is of watching the news, live (I think it was live) as the wall was falling down. For some reason, I knew even then, at the young age of five that this meant a huge change in the face of the world. I didn't understand all the details, but somehow, I understood that the world was now standing a little farther from everybody killing each other and destroying everything. It's interesting to think that at this time, 20 years ago, I was watching the world change. And it's a neat early memory. :-)

Flagstaff, and game, this weekend, were awesome. It's progressing a bit slower than I wanted, but I think I can push ahead a little faster with things. I owe much thanks to Dave for letting me crash as often as I want to at his place. Which I plan on taking him up on again this coming Friday, when I return to Flagstaff for the liturgy in honor of the feast day of St. John Chrysostom.

I also feel compelled to mention I actually saw a Great Horned Owl on my way home from work today, which was pretty awesome.

This is my post from Adiml4adults dealing with my costume. Squee (or not, your choice)

....I was a bit more extravagant this year with my costume than in the past, deciding to go towards my esoteric and obscure tendencies...

( Holy Saints, Batman! )

( The Broken Ship )

Nikos, it seems, has indeed utterly rejected me. He will not come to me anymore. I was astonished that he even bothered to come to me this morning, until i remembered his love for orange juice. Right after he was done, he started biting me left and right until he went back to his cage. I'm not sure why he's suddenly decided I'm persona non grata. The nearest thing I can figure is that he blames me for Mom going to the mental hospital at St. Luke's. Although his abandonment of me couldn't have come at a worse time for myself, emotionally, nothing I can really do.

But if he's bonded to mom without me realizing it, this will make things much better for him when/if I get to Boston. Probably a good thing.

After having worried myself sick in the last week and a half over this court thing, I've just given up. There's nothing I can do to make things better for this situation right now, so I might as well stop picking at it. It's too overwhelming to worry about anyway. So why the heck should I even bother? Meh.

I had two dreams last night, that I can remember. One was totally ripped from one of the Indiana Jones movies, where there was a boulder rolling down a hallway after me. It was definitely an Inca-style hallway, with all the huge, irregularly-shaped blocks interlocked with one another. The round boulder was almost on top of me, when I found a side hallway. Darted inside and the boulder rolled past me. I could see that it was being pushed by a bunch of yelling, screaming government officials. All in spiffy coats, dressed up to hunt down money and pocket it for themselves. After they passed, I laid a trap for them, and continued on down the hallway.

In the other dream, I was fired from work for being late, which was somehow connected to going above and beyond the call of duty for a poor stranded tourist. I remember being worried about never being able to find a job again because of reference purposes, but then all of the rangers (especially Jim and Anne) basically said "To the crows with you, Jon!" and said they would be happy to be my references. Somehow the whole situation was connected to the V-V petroglyph site, but I'm not sure how. It was all very, very jumbled, and I'm still not able to make complete sense of it.

And finally: a happy note to end this entry.

I Love xkcd from NoamR on Vimeo.

Oak Creek Nut Brown Ale with a Terry Pratchett book was a really good idea. My goodness, I am almost relaxing.

Here it is, under the cut.

( So, why do I want to be a priest anyway? )

Now that that's done, gotta work on my spiritual biography. I wonder whether I should begin with my earliest church experiences when I was little, or simply from High School, when religion started to matter...

Eh, always best to start from the beginning.

I got a letter from the Metropolitan on Friday (apparently, the same day as I was going insane), but I can't read his handwriting, save for a few words. Yargh. I'll need to pour through it and translate it on Wednesday.

I also got a letter today from the office of the chancellor of the Metropolitanate (? I'm not sure if it exactly would count as say, an archdiocese, so i'm a wee bit confused on what, exactly to call it), suggesting that I send to him a resume, a biography, and a letter about why I want to be a priest. The first and last are pretty easy; all I have to do with my resume is add onto it more church stuff (which for some reason most people you submit a resume to really don't care about...come to think of it, I might have a version that would be perfect), and the last I can cough up in an hour...

But the biography. Man. I mean, I COULD send the whole (despite being only half-completed) autobiography I wrote several summers ago (at about 106 pages), but that would just be....way wrong. On the other hand, I am WAY too harsh on myself for an autobiography anyway. For that matter, how do I sum up myself in two, or three pages, anyway?

I dunno, do any of you want to do it for me? No, really, DO you? I'll draw something and mail it to you if you do. I can't afford to send real cookies. And I'm still not exactly in the right frame of mind to write about myself in purely neutral terms.

Yargh. Yesterday royally sucked.i don't really want to get into it. Today is better...minus the fact that this game is going off on one sided random tangents out of nowhere! Which is actually entertaining.

Court date. Pre-trial conference two months ago. I assume much money will be stolen/eaten from me by the government. Which also means that I can't do any traveling to Utah or Mexico until I know how much money they will take from me. Naturally, I can't afford any legal advice either...which means I am going to be screwed. Oh well. I feel too apathetic to care about anything anymore.

*sigh* Every time something goes remotely well, five other things go wrong. I hate this state.

Looks like I will be in Flag tomorrow, but not for the reason I wanted.

Because of financial issues, I wasn't able to pay the ticket I got outside of flagstaff in time, and it's past the original court date. Because of our WONDERFUL justice system assuming that everybody who doesn't pay on time is running from the law, if I don't show up in court tomorrow, there'll be a warrant out for my arrest. As dashing as me being a wanted criminal would be *cough, sarcasm, cough*, this isn't something I really want. So, of course, 9:30 in the fracking morning, and probably only to get my license revoked (with my horrid luck), which means I'd have no way to get home.... and no way into work, for that matter. Or the Judge will just hurl me into jail anyway, and there goes being a priest, which means my only choice left in life will be for me to work as a low-level peon for the rest of my life, never accomplishing anything to help the world.

Or hell, maybe I'm worrying over too much. I mean, I do have legitimate reasons. Mom went crazy and is at the mental ward of St. Luke's again, and I had to help with some financial aspects of that, not to mention having to buy groceries and stuff for the family. This paycheck is literally the first one I've had to myself, mostly because I haven't revealed the fact that I got paid yet to anybody, save Dad who had to get his damned menthol cigarettes, or as he calls them, "his precious." But aside from that, to myself. Maybe I can just explain it all, say "hey, I actually feel i need to take traffic school," pay the fee for that, and we can be on my way. I hope. But for some reason the office in flagstaff has always been rather...disgruntled, and COMPLETELY unhelpful. Case in Point: I had to wait on the phone for almost 45 minutes before I even heard a human voice.

Sidenote: Even though I was late for the court date at the Hassayampa Justice Court too (granted, by only a day), they were SUPER NICE there. They even TOOK MY PAYMENT OVER THE PHONE. Which shocked me. Flagstaff insists on snail-mailed checks (which is the main reason for the damned court date). But yes. They were kind. Sweet, even. And even cracked jokes along with me. A+++, would get ticket there again. (Except I won't. But you know, like, if I WERE...)

Holy flying fish batman!: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1221391/Roadkill-Tourists-left-stunned-lioness-attacks-buffalo--right-middle-traffic-jam.html

Today was both good and not so good. I'm just tired, I guess, of this place. Well, not tired. Tired implies you can sleep it off. It's more of a weariness in the soul that I fear might take a bit of time to recover from after I've left here.

I had to go in an hour and a half earlier than normal....and stay a full day. Nobody wanted to cover the last few hours, when I got a call from my mom about her needing to go to the hospital. So, while I am worried about her, I'm stuck at work, and not able to focus as much as I'd like...leaving me to leave the void key turned for almost half an hour before I finally noticed. ARGH. and with my luck, I'll get yelled at for it tomorrow. Granted, I did fix it...and i actually didn't panic or freak out about it, which I would normally do.

It's also probably the last time I'll see Di, who won't come back to work at the castle until January 2nd. I'll miss her, along with Anne and Jim most of all when I end up leaving.

Sidenote: Nikos seems to enjoy Led Zeppelin. He's beeping and merping and reeping, as well and bobbing up and down and generally being excited by it. He normally doesn't react to music, either...I digress.

OH, speaking of which, there was a customer today who was involved with recreations of Renaissance Music. AWESOME. Naturally, I nerded out with him for a time, and we talked obscure renaissance music, period texts, and...just nerdy history things, pretty much. That was probably the highlight of the day, actually.

Random unexpected! Random today: One of the rangers got engaged reciently, and I was sharing the story of how I proposed to Katelyn way back when, and I mentioned later that I couldn't do anything nearly as awesome like that again, because I'd be labeled as uncreative. Anne then said that I should marry "That young lady from Baltimore." When I told her that she JUST got married, she was shocked, saying "But...you...her....and...ARGH!" (Or something akin to that.) I'm not exactly sure why she was acting so flustered about it. Course, if I had been ready to marry... Anyway, It reminded me that I haven't called Krissy in a while and I really need to do that, to which I plan to do on Wednesday in between working on the final touches on my maps for the new campaign.

Speaking of which, if you're at all interested, here's some of the details of my new campaign setting: ( I call it Ruma Simi. Also, some of you might find some of these names oddly familiar. )